So I went with Janelle to see the sex of her baby today.  She's having a girl.  Her fourth child in 4 years!  I know it sounds crazy, but that's what I always wanted... lots of kids close in age.  Oh well.  It went okay. I think Janelle's pregnancy is particularly difficult for me because I was due 2 months before her, so each milestone she hits I automatically go to where I should be.  I should have had my ultrasound.  I should have a tummy like hers.  But instead I cried a million tears and lost another baby.  My sixth miscarriage in ten years of marriage.  I am so thankful for Meghan and Mark, but my heart hurts.  A lot.

We are currently taking classes to become foster parents.  While I was extremely excited about this in the beginning, I'm not so much anymore.  These will not be my children.  I am helping them, but odds are they will go back to their parents (which is a good thing) and I will be left with another type of loss.  I don't know.  I just don't know. 

Meghan is a big girl now.  She'll be FIVE next month.  I can't believe it.  She's a sweet girl who hates getting her hair done *lol*, loves pretending she's mommy to her babydolls and stuffed animals... and My Little Ponies, watching television (which she's only allowed an hour a day, two at the most), not too into her homeschooling but she's learning a lot.  She knows the names and sounds of all the letters.  She reads a few words.  She is my heart.

Marky is a wild little boy.  Always into something, but can actually play by himself really well.  He loves his hotwheel cars.  Always has.  He carries a few around everywhere he goes.  He throws fits and whines A LOT.  He's very rough, but very affectionate.  It's weird because as much as he drives me crazy, I love him so much and he's constantly showing his love for me.  He makes me so angry sometimes though!  He also loves television.  Dora, Diego, Max and Ruby, Yo Gabba Gabba, Backyardagins... just some of his favorites.  Meghan's favorite is Max and Ruby. 

We go to the library about once a week.  Usually for preschool story time.  They are very good, and we usually do puzzles and check out a few books while we are there.  Usually one or two that have something to do with Meghans homeschool cirriculum.  We do lots of baking and cooking together.  Although they are only 3 and 4, I'm pretty sure they could make home made chocolate chip cookies without my help *lol*  Hey, I LOVE cookies!  Marky always talks about 'tiny Elijah' 'tiny Xavier' 'tiny Matthew' and 'big Matthew'.  He prays for them everynight.  Meghan loves cousin Sarah (who she rarely sees) Beverly, and Kayla.  Marky is potty trained!!!  Right when he turned 3 I knew he was ready, I was just being lazy.  So off came the diaper and he was trained within 2 weeks. Over night as well.  He's such a big boy and I am so proud of him.  Meghan can color inside the lines now (for the most part) and colors things the color they should be which is really neat to me.  She knows the days of the week and some of the months. She knows Valentine's Day is coming up and is quite excited   I get more cleaning done during the day now then I once did. I remember the days of 2 hour nap times for both kids and scrubbing the house as they slept.  Those days are long gone, however I began making Mark take a nap again.  He was just too cranky without it.  So he takes maybe an hour... or a little more.  Meghan plays in her room or sometimes downstairs.  Xaiver takes a nap as well.  I've been babysitting him off and on since he was an infant.  Now 2 1/2 I've been watching him for about the past two months.  It gets crazy having him here too... him and Marky fight all day long. 

So, we have about 24 inches of snow outside right now with an additional 10-20 on the way.  We've already had one snowstorm in December with 18 inches. This is crazy stuff.  Last year I think we may have gotten 3 inches TOTAL.  Here in VA, we don't get all that much snow.  This year is definitely the exception.

Well, I wanted to write a little about the kids.  Better go for now.